I Always Do it in the Wrong Order

Philippians 4:6–7 (ESV)

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

Most people worry and fret before they make a big, life changing decision.  For some reason, I always do this in the wrong order.  I tend to make a big decision with great boldness… then worry and fret that I did the wrong thing.  I have done this all my life.  I asked Linda to marry me. It was exciting.  Then three weeks later it suddenly set in that this was a big decision.  This was for life.  What did I know about being married?  Nothing?  I spent three weeks panicking over the decision we had already made.  The same thing has happened with pretty much every call I have taken.  I make the decision.  I announce that I am taking the call.  There is no going back.  Then I worry.  I fret.  Panic sets in.  On a smaller scale this has happened with every most purchases I have made – buying a house or a car.  Then I worry – how can we afford this?  Some would call this buyer’s remorse.  I just call it worry or fear, or self-doubt. 

Now you need to know that yes, I did take all those decisions seriously. I prayed for each one.  Also they all turned out to be right – Thank God.  He was guiding.  He took care of me and of us through it all. Linda, was and is the best decision I ever made. 

So why did I worry?  The answer is, because I didn’t know the future.  I had and still have no control over the future.  Venturing out, not knowing how things will turn out, is scary.  That’s true whether you panic before you make the decision, or if you do it backwards like me.  That’s why I wanted to share with you all today something I read this morning by an author named Walt Wangerin Jr. in a book called As for Me and My House.  He was writing about couples deciding to get married, but what wrote fits with anytime we have a big choice to make –

“He is at the birthing of our children, blessing the event. He is at the tragedies to come (but he's there, by virture of his timelessness, now), supporting and consoling us— therefore, we can go forward trustingly, even to tragedies. God joins the times for us. God comforts and enables us despite our ignorance—and to trust absolutely in him who knows the future is as good as though we knew the future ourselves…

Once when I was a tiny child my father put me on a train bound from Chicago to Grand Rapids. I didn't like the idea, and twice I ran off the train before it left. I was homesick already. I was terrified to be thrust alone into the dark tunnel of the future. If I had my way, I was not leaving home and my haven. But this is what my father had to say about it: “I'm going ahead of you. Do you think I would leave you alone? I'll meet you at the station in Grand Rapids. Wait, wait, and see if I don't.” And I was comforted, and I was set free to travel. I knew no more about the trip there; neither did I know how Dad would beat me there (he had to leave later and was flying). But in place of knowledge I had the promise of the one who loved me. He who hugged me now would hug me then. And so long as I loved him and believed in him, I could be liberated to go alone.”

That’s what I have learned and am learning – no matter what the future holds God goes with us, goes ahead of us and is already there when we arrive.  We may not know what the future holds but we know the God who holds the future.  So the best thing to do before and after you make a big choice is to put it all in God’s hands… to do what Paul told the Philippians to do - “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”