“Forgiving Others – One of the Best Gifts You Can Give Yourself”
“And forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.”
Matthew 6:12
Obviously to be forgiven by God is one of the greatest gifts God gives us. By that gift He sets us free from guilt, shame and death. Even more wonderful, forgiving our sins is a gift He pays for. The cost to Him was high – the death of His own Son on the cross. Yet to us, He gives this gift freely. There is simply no better news than this – “that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not counting men’s sins against them.” We are all guilty, yet the Scriptures assure us that “there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” Wow! What a gift.
Another
great gift is when some other person forgives us. When you know that you have wronged someone…
hurt them… caused them pain – there are no greater more loving words to hear from
someone than these three words, “I forgive you.” With those words the healing of a
relationship begins. Two people are
reconciled. When someone speaks those
words to you, they are saying to you, “Yes, what you did or said hurt me. However, I love you more than any hurt you
have caused me. Indeed, I love you so
much that I am not willing to allow what you did stand between us. I forgive you.” (By the way, when you forgive someone else
you are saying the same thing to them.)
Once again, what a great gift!
I wonder however, if you knew that when you forgive someone else, you are giving yourself a gift as well. What do I mean? The truth is, when we refuse to forgive… when we hold a grudge against someone for something they did to or said about us, we are imprisoning our own heart. Be refusing to forgive, we are allowing whatever bad thing was done or said – to continue to hurt us. Refusing to let go of our anger, we are creating fertile soil for resentment to grow. Resentment becomes a heavy chain on our lives. I knew a man on my vicarage who had allowed such resentments to take root and grow in his life for 40 years. He was always angry about something. His resentment of others was destroying his marriage. It was a roadblock in his relationship with God (He hadn’t been to communion in 20 years). In other words, when we refuse to forgive the person we hurting the most is US!
I think that’s why Jesus taught us to pray this way – “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.” By forgiving us our sin… including the resentments we hold on to – God has set us free to give to others and to ourselves this wonderful gift of forgiving others. He has made it possible to unlock the chains of anger and hurt by which we imprison our own hearts. This may sound counterintuitive – but if you want to be free of the hurts that others have inflicted on you then do what God has done for you. Let go of those hurts, of the anger, of that grudge… let go by forgiving as God has forgiven you. It doesn’t matter if they are sorry or not. It doesn’t matter if they have apologized or not. God forgave us before we ever turned to Him and ask. This is not only a wonderful gift to give to others. This will be one of the greatest gifts you ever give to yourself – Forgive others as God has forgiven you.
